For the three people out there who care, yes, I still exist.

Things have been both hectically eventful and mind-numbingly boring around here. On the one hand, the average day involve me sleeping until around 2:00 in the evening, waking up, and doing some variation of eating or playing video games, throwing in a work-out session in there at random intervals.

While the video games are nice, they don't hold the obsessive grip they once trapped me with. Some may frown on me saying this, but I really, really miss that feeling. Once upon a time, a good consol RPG could keep me completely immersed for hours at a time, without a care for the real world, focused on guiding the game's characters to their goals, whatever they may be. It's kind of a natural high that lasted for hours on end. Star Ocean III had me in this state for a very long time, but then for reasons I honestly don't remember very well, I was unable to play for a day or two. When I came back, the thrill was gone, and I couldn't get it back. Part of this was because none of the games battles challenged me any more; I had found a combination of equipment, magic, and tactics that basically rendered the entire game effortless toward the end. I literally beat the final boss without taking any damage at all. I've been going through games I've already finished, trying to get back into it, and find myself no longer able to attain that euphoric immersion. I'm hoping this just means the right game needs to come by soon to return the thrill. I'm not sure what I'm going to do if that doesn't happen. (Side note: Full review of Star Ocean III later.)


A friend who lives a good hour or two away dropped by for a few days, and the main event while he was around was Magic: the Gathering.

I was still using my green fatty deck (Melissa, the one you got to come around flawlessly that one night) and I couldn't draw the right card for the life of me. I couldn't get the right card when I needed it. Ever. I won one game in those, simply because I kept getting some variation of mana screwed. I looked through it, trying to pin-point a problem, but it's a solid deck that simply won't come around while I'm playing it.

It wasn't that bad losing all the time, though, 'cause I'd spend the majority of the game talking about how my Ultimate Red-Green Deck of Doom (its official name) will splatter everything it touched all over the wall once I got the Goblin Sharpshooters I needed to pull it together. I've got 'em now, but I haven't actually pulled the deck together yet... (I'll post it for those interested once I get it finished.)

Then there was this one game though... Eight people, two four man teams. We decided teams by drawing cards, those who got mountains were on one team and forests on another.

The teams ended up stacked, with two death decks, a counterspell/flying/shut-down deck, and another deck no one really cared on one side versus four creature intensive decks. I think I was the only person on my side not playing red, and my (inexperienced) little brother was the only one not playing green. To make it worse, another player on my team had only started playing that night.

Anyone who plays Magic knows how this is going to go. Me and the only other experienced player know this game is going to suck. To make things worse, he doesn't get a forest until somewhere around turn ten, and he has a green hand.

I wouldn't have minded losing. I had in mind finishing the game with as much dignity as possible, doing as much damage as I could before all my creatures were rendered useless.

At least, until they started laughing. We were getting our asses kicked, at least two of us were visibly angry, and they couldn't stop giggling like little girls. Allovasudden I felt like seriously starting a fist-fight, right then and there. I was self-aware enough to keep myself from doing it, but I don't think I've been that angry ever before. One "fuck you guys" and a few thrown cards later, I stalked back to my room, successfully ailinating every local friend I had.

Everything's blown over by now, but all the same, my rage over something as unimportant as a game of Magic has got me thinking... I mean, why the hell did I get so mad over a no-stakes game? I mean, I'm glad that I had the willpower to stop myself from hurting someone, but this isn't the first time I've gotten so angry over a game of magic.






Last, but not least, everyone who sees this, copy and paste the link in "music" now. Download that MP3, don't worry, it's perfectly legal. That is some of the most beutiful music I've ever heard. The singer goes by the handle Pixietricks, and the music is done by Gray Lightning and Sephfire. This is some of the best stuff OCR has put out in a long time, and even if you're not a video game fanatic, this is very good stuff.